One Night Food Stands

I hate the term ‘binge’ but then I guess that deters me from having to admit to bingeing and therefore from doing it in the first place…..most of the time.

To me the term conjures images of Cadbury multi-packs and movie bags of Doritos, take away pizzas and whole tubs of ice cream; a big fat person mindlessly shoving endless amounts of food into their mouth.  I think, in reality, bingeing can have different connotations, and ultimately, effects, on everyone.

For me, a binge doesn’t necessarily mean huge quantities of food.  I will have episodes, normally fuelled by feeling hungry, where something in my mind snaps and my whole outlook on my diet is thrown out of the window. It truly is mindless eating where I may only eat six marshmallows totalling 160 calories, but without even thinking about it.

The oddest thing is, I can’t fully explain what goes on in my mind. It’s a process of:

• Man I am so hungry and I am so fed up of feeling hungry
• I can eat six marshmallows and it will only be 160 calories
• I deserve those marshmallows, I have been a saint with food all week
• TEEHEE I’m eating these marshmallows and they actually don’t taste that good, but it feels so naughty and exciting
• I’m eating these marshmallows now, I may as well have six more, even then it will only be 320 calories
• Now I’ve eaten twelve marshmallows, may as well eat a piece of toast with peanut butter too
• Etc etc into impenetrable doom

By the time the fiasco has finished, I realise I’ve managed to consume a good 800 calories over my daily allowance. The stupid thing is, it’s not as if I’m even eating junk, I’m just eating without reason or logic behind it and I believe that it is this mindless illogic that’s at the core of anyone’s binge.

It also highlights the power of hunger and how it can render the most sane dieters gibbering idiots scooping Nutella out of the jar with a finger at 10 o’clock at night.

In conclusion, a binge is a little bit like a one night stand; you’re not really thinking and all sensible judgment is dulled by emotion and desire. At the time it feels naughty and exciting, it satisfies an urge and dulls a craving. But in the cold hard light of day you feel a bit silly and disappointed. You can’t help but wonder if it was worth it, and all you’re left with is a headache and a mouth that tastes like a badger’s bum.